Out of my Element


So back in the day I used to be a big boot camp and spin class attender. Twice, three times a week if I could. Over the past couple years (odd diets, my affair with high intensity interval training and my love of mountain biking) my love of ass kicking classes has fallen by the way side (honestly what does that saying even mean? Did I even type it right?)
Ever since I started going to Golds in Burnaby I’ve been itching to get back into classes because let’s face it, there’s nothing like a good game of follow the leader to take your mind off the agonizing pain in your muscles.

Lesson #246 – Read class descriptions! I thought a class called “Sweat” would involve some cardio, maybe intervals, weights – all the stuff I love. I’m sure this class (led by an adorable married couple) mixes it up but tonight It was probably something I should have passed on.
I walk in, do some quick introductions and am advised we wouldn’t be doing any cardio tonight just arms and chest, ending with core. I’m cool with chest exercises, presses, flyes, it’s all good but this workout had none of that, all the chest exercises were push-ups – not sure if I’ve mentioned this in posts previous but I frickin hate push-ups! Hate may be a strong word but it’s the only thing that suits it. Anyways considering my neck has been sore all day and I was really looking forward to a good sweat I was immediately nervous and regretting my decision. Also I’m assuming everyone else in the class had time to warm up because I didn’t see anyone’s jaw drop in horror like mine when we started the workout with incline push-ups, followed by tricep dips and narrow bicep curls. (No warm up just straight arm death)14 of each, 4 times through – that’s 56 push-ups! I did that math in my head so if it’s wrong screw off! If you are like me and said “56 push-ups WTF?” IT GETS WORSE! After that round was done we switched to regular push-ups (I was well past the point of swallowing my pride and doing the push-ups on my knees), then overhead tricep extensions followed by regular bicep curls – 12 of each, 4 times through – make that another 48 push-ups! My arms were starting to become jello, I was heavily regretting not warming up. The next round was decline push-ups, which I surprisingly pounded out the first set of ten, followed my skull crushers and wide grip bicep curls, 10 each, 4 times through (you are seeing the pattern aren’t you) – I would say to add another 40 push-ups to my already ridiculous amounts but there was no way I could do 4 sets of ten and found myself laughing the third round when I pounded out a flimsly 2 decline push-ups. The core workout was brutal too – I was beginning to dislike my cute little married instructors. We were standing on plastic weight plates and sliding them one leg at a time towards our chest (mountain climbers) while in the plank position for 40 seconds, followed by bicycles, another plank/plate slide exercise and another an crunch death exercise. Second time through was 30 seconds of work, 3rd time through 20 seconds of work – woof my abs were killing me.
Then the sadistic side of me kicked in – there was talk of a “burnout” – I couldn’t quit now, everything except my legs were jello, my legs had to follow suit of course.
Have you ever heard of the song Roxanne? Of course you have! But you are probably used to the drinking game – one sip for everytime Sting says “Roxanne”. Well I introduce you to the burpee version of it – that’s right one Burpee for every “Roxanne” – I’ll tell you right now I much prefer the drinking game but I accomplished my goal – leg jello!
All in all the class wasn’t as bad as I thought it was gonna be (I only said this once I knew I would be getting out of it alive) and I look forward to taking another one of their classes, next year lol (kidding)

Sister Act Fitness endorses stepping out of your comfort zone and pushing your body to see what you are capable of – you may surprise yourself and end up doing 125 push-ups. And then you may barely be able to lift your arms to take your ponytail out but hey it’s all in good fun


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